A time to repent, pray and give! May I begin this journey openly with a prayer of penance toward my own inward to journey to the cross. I will be posting my spiritual writings as I make this journey this year. For God has given me a vision of myself that is not all that it might be as a warning to dig deeper into my own pool of faults before questioning those things that are to be....Many of you know, I have been working leisurely at questions to pose if we are living in the dawn of the Lords Day. I had a personal vision of my spiritual self, So I take leave of this to look deeper into myself and what I have found so far disheartens. Never the less I continue with one mere reflection of my vision applied to me I found and I pray to my Lord for:
Embarking on my journey of lent my journey to the cross you may say the first call is to repentance. A self examination of just how sin ridden I am encrusted with selfishness, eroded in self indulgence I am the epitome of denial. Corrupting myself and all too often the Spirit of Christ within me, truly I say woe is me. Carefully clothed in my Christianity using it to insulate my Spirit allowing me to appear and even act on the word of God while internalizing my own sins in a mountain of self justification. Fully embracing the intimacy of Christ within me, while failing to express outwardly the beauty and grace within the gift of forgiveness. Insolating and isolating myself in fear of reproach, reproach our loving Father has already covered the price of…How filled with foolishness I am! I pray to my Jesus for these are sins I have no recourse within my own knowledge to overcome that he show mercy, his loving kindness that I not be swallowed up in my sin. Repent is the cry in my heart yet I know not how to repent of such childish foolishness. Clothed carefully in my cloak of Christianity to ward off those of the world, and shielded gallantly with my sin to ward off those of the Lord; I in myself imposed isolation draw on the word in my whirlwind of hope that I might somehow please the Lord in my sinful state. For thy sake dear Lord that those who see my hope in you are not dismayed through my sinful lack of faith and disobedience. I offer my selfishness onto you Lord to teach and guide me into overcoming these sins in and of your love for me For you have shown me Lord my spiritual continence embedded and encrusted with darkness without; with only glimmers of your light escaping helplessly trying to give to those in deeper entrenchments and holes of darkness while in a tomb of darkness myself. Build in me Lord the will power to remove the crustiness, of my own selfishness impute in me the wisdom to walk out of the dungeon of self indulgence I have created in the light and truth within your Holy Spirit dear and faithful Jesus I pray in your mighty and exalted name a prayer of penance.
My first step in my vigil to the cross in this year of our Lord 2011.
